A very non-Christmassy poem I wrote on Christmas

And the answer might be…

Because these are things that happened,

These are moments that were real.

And erasing the proof doesn’t erase the past

Or the memory

Or the experience.

They still exist in the history of the universe –

Forever to contain the potential of the moment.

I am grateful the memories stopped when they did,

That things were not prolonged.

You served me and I tried to serve you

As a valuable life lesson –

One that, while short, was not always sweet

While fast-paced, never seemed harried.

One completely necessary for the freedom

To move on

To move up

To seek something more

Something better.

And to realize the value of you

And be able to say thanks

Instead of reaching for curses and slurs to protect my pride.

You showed me love but it was not the love I needed

You showed me respect but it came with strings

You showed me how to be who I am with someone who had expectations for me as well.

And there is no repayment.

There were tears,

There were drunken phone calls.

There were yelling matches and whispered promises.

And there is now quiet

And peace.

To say Thank You.

I’m Done.

And Goodbye.